THIS THING CALLED…BEAUTY.

beauty

After I read this piece which again reiterated the ubiquitous mantra “beauty is in the eye of the beholder”, I wondered about beauty and the various human perceptions of it. Clearly, it is an important ideal to humans including (if not more especially) those who claim to not care. It is a word which abounds in discussions among youth, males especially because it is more generically appropriated to the female gender. I therefore took the liberty of running a mini-survey among men aged between 19 to 30 years.

The question was: “This thing called beauty: Take a few minutes to answer this as honestly as you can: ‘What qualities in your opinion, qualify a woman as beautiful?’ No restrictions”

And answers poured in, from the outright ludicrous to the hilarious to the ‘bombshell’ one-worded responses; I have relayed them all with little to zero editing. I like to call them the ‘26 Alphabets of the Beauty language’; they are as follows:

A. ‘Arsenal’ and ‘Barcelona’ and height – very powerful criteria. If u get money, woman character is under your control.

B. Pretty – fine face and body; personality – smart, character and humility.

C. 90% attitude and 10% looks: respectful, moral standards, articulate, at or above my frequency with God and NOT BORING.

D. Exceptional charm, self confidence, shining light that sparkles through her smile and eyes and willing to cook for me.

E. Respect for her man and knows her wifely duties in the kitchen and bedroom, handles children well and is always there for her man; respects God too.

F. Physically attractive, character, endurance and sincerity; I will set tests for her pretending as if I don’t care, she must pass them to prove her resilience, behavior towards money.

G. God fearing and catholic, humble, fun loving, enduring, intelligent, pretty with a lovely figure, intuitively caring with everyone even children.

H. Character and charisma.

I. A sight to behold – physically beautiful, I mean nicely shaped with some flesh here and there (wink), she has to be godly too and intelligent. I trip for intelligent ladies.

J. Neatness and perfect form of facial and body structure.

K. Beautiful – good and humane character (care and love); humble and respectful; God fearing and hardworking; smart and good looking.

L. Beauty physically and at heart; she must have those curves.

M. Respectful, facial beauty and kindness/generosity.

N. Gentleness and good character; other features especially the physical only support these.

O. Right attitude, sound morals, respect to God and humans, good attitude to strangers.

P. Character.

Q. Physically, she should be pretty; I love well-endowed tall, slim, dark ladies;

Emotionally, she should be mature, able to handle stress, independent, not crying easily, think like a woman not a girl;

Spiritually, she’s gotta love the Lord! Know how to pray, know what the scripture says about life situations;

Socially, she’s gotta combine being quiet and playful at the same time, love fun but know how to get serious when needed, dress well, act gracefully with poise, good listener.

R. Good height, slim not too much at least average, straight leg and good character.

S. Facial appeal, humility, sincerity and intelligence.

T. Truthfulness and sincerity.

U. Presentable, elegant, courageous, certainly tall, sleek, bold and beautiful; good character remains constant that is, respectful, God fearing, trustworthy, tolerant, understanding (ok with 60%).

V. Physical appeal, being lovable, respectful, tolerable and homely, etc.

W. Her smile in its genuineness, not lousy, can be discreet and very observant. A go-getter. One who takes care of her body, a good shape is always a plus. Stable and consistent, not prone to excessive mood swings. An optimist at heart with a beautifully logical mind.

X. Adorning her outer grace with wisdom, tolerance, understanding, and faithfulness to God and men.

Y. Lovely eyes, figure-8, long straight legs added advantage. Must have common sense, manageable character.

Z. A woman who is beautiful inside and outside and loves God.

My personal favorite is opinion Q, because it is exhaustive. But as I feared, a lot of young men (besides me…right?) have a meager or no understanding of beauty. First proof of this is in the opinions polled above where the word ‘beautiful’ is used repeatedly in the definition of itself – an obvious sign of misconception.

Another observation of mine which is as interesting as it is not startling is that many young men cannot ignore the relevance of physical appearances and attraction to beauty. So preach all you want about the beauty of a woman ONLY radiating from the soul and inner peace and cumbayaya cumbaya, the world is saying ‘eyes eat first’.

beautiful-black-woman

What do you think though? What is your personal opinion on the truth of this thing called beauty?

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27 thoughts on “THIS THING CALLED…BEAUTY.

  1. I hate E and I. I thought these were supposed to be for beauty and not wife material. Which means if you’re catholic, you’re beautiful?

  2. Wow, Juks this is a lovely piece of work. I love the Q most cos ur has everything. Beauty is one thing that has many sides to it. I can say one n another might say otherwise, but what we knw is that we can identify someone who is beautiful. It might not be the figure, character, etc., but it is something we can accept personally n individually. Great piece of work there bro

    • I agree, Tosyn, we might differ on the true definition of beauty but ironically, the woman I call ‘beautiful’ is most likely going to be seen as ‘beautiful’ by another man. Be it physical or spiritual (lol)

  3. I admire ur commentery on beauty but I see dt it really didn’t tell us if beauty in his sense is a d physical appearance or d ontogical or religious. These 3 ideas of beauty r combined to keep me unresolved. But for me, ontologically n religiously beauty has nothn to do with physical appearance. D idea dt beauty is in d eye of d beholder is in a literal sense -in d physical appearance. For me beauty I divide in 2 categories. 1 subjectv beauty wia one can say one is beautiful n another ll doubt it, 2 objectv beauty wia everybdy accepts dt one is beautiful

    • I agree, Samuel, I did not set out to categorize or even define beauty. with all of these near-crazy definitions, who am I to endorse one?lol. I however find your classifications of the concept interesting. Question is: is there any kind of beauty that EVERY person would attest to?

      • Yes! There r pple or things everybdy attest to be beautiful without doubt. If I say God it may sound religious. Bt I can use a car. In jeeps its objctiv d infintiy jeep is beautiful bt nt everybdy agrees dt hummer jeep is beautiful

    • my dear, forget that thing oh. I used to talk like you before. I believe physical appearance does not matter until I got stuck somewhere. then I realized that deep down in you, (you never know its dear) you care about physical appearance

  4. First of many comments to come,actually d first blog am eva subscribing to ( so ojukwu u shud b clap 4 me)….yea thank u thank u(taking a bow):). I particularly love Q cos twas quite exhaustive and all encompassing,dt said hardly do they cum wv such all-in-one goodies. Abeg if u find 1 of such, holla me asap…its abt dt time u knw. Beauty more often dan not starts wv d eyes and it may not necessary b looks(even tho most oftentimes it is)..it cud b d beauty abt d way she does smtin(attitude mor like). 9ce one bro, expecting more. Cheers!

    • lmao…thanks Bede. if I find such, I will let u know with an IV to the ceremony where I shall wed her.lol. I agree with you, it could vary but almost always begins with eye

  5. Wowww! Quite interesting! There really is no encompassing definition of ‘Beautiful’ as it concerns a lady cos someone that I think is beautiful may be ‘just there shaa’ or ‘which kain beautiful’ for u. Methinks though that its more of a physical thing cos me and almost every other person (I guess) would say a girl is beautiful if she has FEATURES FIRST that appeals to one’s sense. You can not see a girl for the first time and u see her godly,caring,respectful…..part and that u don’t see these at first does not stop u from saying she is beautiful if she has d facial structure,curves and all what not that appeals to you. So beauty, is really in d eyes of the beholder cos ur eyes first tell u she is beautiful…abi na lie?

  6. Nice piece Martin. Beauty cld mean different tins to different ppl cos wat is attractive to me may nt be attractive to d man next door. Same way some pple hate sugar n prefer d ‘not so sugary’ tins instead, same way a lady may not be seen to be beautiful by one despite possessing d ‘right curves’ till her character is proven. Then, she becomes beautiful to d man, irrespective of her visage, her ‘figure 8’ or lack thereof. So, I beg to disagree with all those who say…. ‘physical shape’ must be considered. Just my thoughts. I am definitely following dis blog.

  7. Please tell me Y is not true! She must have common sense? Ouch! That’s a blow below the belt.

    As for moi…beauty being in the eyes of the beholder is cool. I mean who doesn’t want to behold a beautiful thing? I bet the dictionary would describe the word as being appealing, good to the sight, nice to behold and so on.

    But for those who think character can’t be “seen”…I smile. Have you ever seen a woman/ lady who is soooo drop dead gorgeous that 3 or less minutes in her presence; you either say she’s shallow, lacks “common sense”, she’s not deep…should I continue?

    I’m a female! I know what I’m saying. Which is why I will subscribe to her content being essential! God help you if you bring home a hourglass shaped woman or is it Beyonce decked version and after marriage, you tell your parents you want to return her to the Market? Wives “purchased” cannot be returned!

    On a lighter note though Chisom, You know i’m dark. When will you propose nahhh…lol.

    I personally like B, C and a host of others. But A? Heavens no! God forbid man describe me (and they do) as an object, then without content! Calamity!

    What I like? Intelligent but not intentionally arrogant with it…it rubs off on us when you are always “showing off your talent”, great sense of humour, a Man in all true sense of it…not in terms of superiority or chauvinism of course…the God factor cannot be bargained. If he looks like Leonardo DiCarpro… y not? You need to ask? He should be good to the “female” eyes of course! At least make more than half of the people in a place look again….and many more.

    And pleaseeeeee…I’m not looking for the perfectly looking man. What’s the point if he looks like Desmond Elliot…before he got fat….and has the humour of Basket mouth…and the spirituality of Chris Oyak….and the business sense of Aliko dangote…but also has the fist of Mohammed Ali? thanks but no thanks!

    Beauty may lie in the eyes of the beholder…but please…look well. And see. You may look and not SEE!

    • Oluwadamilola! Too much point dey worry you, ah swear. Hilarious as always too…lmao! I am so much in agreement with you and this has got me started on something new…wink.
      About that proposal, is it that u’re blind or am I such a terrible ‘proposer’ that you didn’t see – or hear or smell for that matter – when I proposed to you months ago?!! 😦

    • SPOT ON! @jedidiah…..good 2 know this is coming from a lady. Am often dazed to the point of numbness when i come across hourglass,drop dead gorgeous ,queen b type of ladies who are just soooooo BORING (shallow).Your assets matters but your CONTENT is utmost.

  8. I have this uncle, the best uncle I ever had. you know the type that took you to Leventis every weekend while growing up and polo park (now Enugu shopping mall).
    so this guy brought his fiancee to the house and the whole family objected to his marrying the girl.
    Each time the argument comes up he’ll reply “nekwa imi ya kwukwa oto na nkw ukwu ya” meaning she has pointed nose and fine legs……fastforward 12 years after, he is stuck in an unhappy marriage with a trophy wife who cant lift a knife all because of this thing called beauty.

    A word is enough for the wise.

    • Hmmm, Chizzy, so make we no marry woman wey get pointed nose and fine legs ehn? 🙂 So you’re saying that deep down, we are all looking out for that flashy partner BUT take caution! Bah? Thank you dear, well said

  9. These responses from the poll though, very insightful, hilarious and pretty interesting too. A school of thought says that the male gender’s moved by what he sees, and females, by what they hear! Beauty’s in the eye of the beholder and traits I consider as beautiful, another person may consider a put -off! Plus, most times beauty’s up for discuss, we think on only physical attributes of a person or thing. True beauty emanates from within and it radiates without. Its not necessarily a tangible thing that you can visibly see, but it can be felt. Its durable, does not fade, wither or expire. For as long as person lives, it lives. Its the very essence of a person, our substance.

    Some men and women I considered real bombshells back in the days, who are now aged and not quite as ‘easy on the eye’ as they used to be, got me thinking. Our physical attributes will fade as we age. Our skins will wrinkle, firm butts and breasts will sag; we’ll just generally deteriorate with the passing of time. Our persona at that point, becomes what we’ll fall back on. That, right there’s the real beauty embedded! Its all encompassing and has a bearing also on our attitudes. Show me a person who’s got a great attitude, very personable, highly courtesied and I’ll show you true and lasting beauty! Well, at least, that’s my own perception. Lolz.

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